what I miss already..

I was reminiscing yesterday of Hartley's first few days of life. After coming home from the hospital, Hartley had a difficult time adjusting to sleeping during the night. We did everything we could to get her to sleep. The one thing that worked wonders was letting her sleep on our chest or between us in the bed.

[side note: So many times after nursing her in the night and putting her in the swing/bassinet, I would wake up frantically. My mind thought I fell asleep with her on my chest and when I awoke and she wasn't there I would freak out. I can't tell you how many times that happened.]

At the time, I wanted nothing more than to be able to sleep. To get at least 3 hours of consistent sleep. But for weeks I didn't. I remember many nights she would cry inconsolably. Marshall and I would take turns trying to do whatever we could. I remember sobbing for hours during the early morning because nothing worked. Begging Hartley to stop crying. Questioning myself as a mother.

But I so dearly miss those nights of holding and comforting my baby. She's not one to rock to sleep anymore. She's an independent sleeper now.

Why do we always look forward to the day that baby sleeps through the night, starts solids, becomes potty trained, etc.?

There are so many times I find myself looking forward to when Hartley can feed herself. I nurse because it's best for her. It's not always convenient. It hasn't been easy. But it's worth it. And I know when the time comes for her to be weaned, I'm going to regret all the anticipation. I won't have the special time with her anymore, even though we have that time now 5-6 times a day.

It's a part of life. Growing up.

Probably weren't what you were expecting, but it's been on my heart.

Now that I've upset myself, I'm going to sneak in Hartley's room and watch her sleep. It's what I look forward to at the end of the day.

Four Months!

Hartley Moore! You are FOUR months old today!

What are you up to these days?

• You sleep through the night! This is exciting for your Momma! You wake up early, usually between 6:30 and 7am, but sometimes we can get you back to sleep a little while longer.
• Naps are still short, or non-existent (see previous post), but I shouldn't complain because you sleep so well at night.. and in your crib!

• You have become a little faster at nursing, but you still fall asleep. And your new favorite game is to nurse and then talk to me... then nurse some more.. and then talk some more. Daddy thinks this is so funny and wants to get a picture, but that will NOT be happening. When you are nursing and hear Daddy laugh, you stop and look around for him. I know, I think he laughs funny, too.
• You are finally interested in toys, although your lovey Emmie is your favorite. You usually roll over on your side when you have her. You get excited and squeal sometimes when we give her to you. It sure is cute!

• You went to a wedding in Atlanta. You took a road trip to meet your great-grandmother, Grandmama Moore. And you travel to Savannah most every weekend for church. You were also dedicated last weekend. Daddy's family and Grandmommie and Jim were there.
• You will gladly take a bottle now, from anybody. Yay!

• You have grown out of most of your 0-3 month clothes. Mostly the onesies because you have such a long torso! And the 3-6 month onesies and footed sleepers are almost too short! You are getting sooo big. It's exciting watching you grow so quickly. Can't wait to see how much you weigh next week.
• As of tomorrow you will be wearing size 2 diapers.. because we are almost out of size 1.. and your booty hangs out of them.

• You smile and laugh for anybody now. Or squeal. That's your favorite thing to do. And girl you are soo loud! Whenever you see the camera you stop these things, so I rarely get a smiling picture of you.
• Your skin has been an issue from the very beginning. You bathe with Aveeno, wash your hair with Head & Shoulders, lotion up with Aveeno and Aquaphor, and laundry with All Free & Clear. You are doing pretty well with these combos, but we have to be careful especially since you are hot natured and easily get a heat rash.

• You are no longer swaddled, but you are absolutely fine with that! You are free to scoot around in your crib, roll over to your side, flail your arms and kick, kick, kick!
• You love gnawing on your hands and you have found your feet, it's just a matter of holding on to them.

• You are very interested in Maddie and Sassy. You like watching them and sometimes you giggle at them. Pretty soon you will be rolling around the floor with them!

• Everyone thinks you look like your Daddy now. There's no question about it! You have his looks but you get your personality and attitude from me. You make a lot of pouty faces and cry when you don't get your way.

You're a cutie-patootie, Hartley Caroline!

Naps 101

Note to Blog Stalkers, Google Searchers, and/or Hopeless Mothers: Please don't use this as resource for naps.

Babies are funny. Babies are joyful. And babies decide to change things up when you think you've finally mastered a routine.

Our hugest struggle with Hartley is naps. She's always taken 45 minute to hour naps. My life revolves around how long of a nap she'll take. Nap times equal showers, computer time, cleaning, and eating for me.

So what am I to do when she decides she doesn't want to take a nap??

1. I go crazy. I'm hungry, sleep deprived, and look horrible.

2. I cry. I've got the I'm so hopeless. What am I doing wrong? mentality. Ya know the one that emerges a few days after having a baby..

3. I search every website on the topic of naps and nap troubleshooting.

4. I give up.

5. We start the day over.

Sigh.

Marshall and I realized a few weeks ago it was close to nearing the time to drop her last nap of the day. This nap is at about 6pm. Right around the time I try to get dinner ready. Perfect.

After two days of Hartley trying to get out of naps, crying for extended lengths of time, and maybe teething (??), we're attempting a new routine. We're shooting for longer waketimes during the day. We'll see how that works. Here is today's schedule so far.. (after going to bed, oh gosh, I can't remember what time last night, maybe 8-8:30?)

7:00am MOMMA!!!! FEED ME!!!

7:30 lay in bed and play

8:00 diaper change, Edelweiss sleepy time song, in the crib.

10:30 MOMMA!! FEED ME AGAIN!

11:00 walk outside a few minutes, playmat

12:20 diaper change, sing again, in the crib with Emmie :)

umm it's almost 1 now. Oh my gosh, it is really almost 1? I need to eat before that girl wakes up.

Later today, we'll take pictures because she's FOUR MONTHS OLD!! Stay tuned.

floppy hats and christening gowns

What a wonderful weekend we had! My Momma and Jim came over to attend Hartley's baby dedication on Sunday. Of course we had to have a photo shoot with Grandmommie and somehow a sunhat got thrown in there.

She's definitely ready for next year's Derby! We can't wait to take her to the beach this summer. We're taking a family trip to Edisto Island in July. And when I say family, I mean Marshall's immediate family. Eight adults. Five children. Four of those children are two and under. Did I mention we will be staying in ONE house for a whole week?

This could either be really good.. or really bad. :)

I say this every month, but she's becoming so expressive! More and more each week. One week she starts cooing non-stop. The next week it's squealing. Now it's a little giggle here and there. And she's starting this shy kinda smile, where she gets a big grin and then turns away.

I think she might be beginning the teething process. She was so irritable last week. And wouldn't take a nap without being nursed to sleep. We rarely do that..

She doesn't act like her gums are tender, but she is gnawing on everything now. I think I feel a teeny tooth right under her gums. Marshall thinks it's way too early.. but it could be possible. At least the teeth moving up before they expose themselves.

Her eyes are still bluish-gray. And she's outgrowing some 3-6 month onesies in length. It's ridiculous.

Hartley wore the "family" christening gown. Would you call it that even though she wasn't christened?? Idk..

But she behaved sooo well! And she looked pretty darn cute. I'm glad that our families were there. Marshall's whole family (minus brother-in-law Jason) were there as well as Momma and Jim. And can you believe we got a family picture in!

I can't get over how quickly she's growing up. She turns four months old this week and we'll go to the doctor next week. I can't wait to see how much she's grown!

one of these is not like the other

Can you guess which one?

Happy Mother's Day to me!

naptime.

All things considered... naps have gotten better. Hartley has been making it 2.5-3 hours between feedings! For a few days I thought she had been sleeping the majority of her naptime. I was so wrong.

I busted out the video camera a few days ago. Set it up next to her crib. Record.

I was very surprised when I went back and watched the tape. I only got through 40 minutes, but managed to watch it rewind the entire tape. Hartley played the first 10 minutes, then took a 20 minute nap.. only to wake up and play an additional 10 minutes. After that I'm not sure how long she stayed awake. I know she had to fall asleep again because I peeked in her nursery later on and she was out!

So this little booger is having way too much fun when no one is around! She spent the majority of her "nap" sucking on her hands, trying to roll over, looking around, and scooting into different positions.

I know we have it easy right now. Someday she'll want to completely avoid taking a nap and try to get out of the crib. Also, she's going on 4 months. She's learning so many new skills and wanting to practice them. I can't blame her!

And.. I'm not sure if this not napping phase helps her sleep through the night. Not that she slept through the past three nights or anything. :)

Oh, with the above picture of Marshall and Hartley.. they are tv buddies. It's their bonding time. We let Hartley stay up a little later on Friday to watch Smallville with Daddy. Hartley thinks Tom Welling is hot, too!

slideshow

I've been working on a little slideshow. I'm not sure if I'm done with it yet.

Enjoy.

a few videos

at 3.5 months.

Apparently babies are supposed to roll over in this order: tummy to back, then back to tummy. Considering a certain someone hates tummy time, that order has been reversed. We'll take what we can get though.

She's holding one of her many loveys "Emmie." Emmie has a good sized beak that Hartley loves to chew, er nurse, on. And yes, she loves covering her face with her toys/loveys/bibs.

And here's some footage of our jabber-mouth. She had some good giggles this afternoon. She's sooo much fun right now.

running of the.. mouth

Marshall and I are both pretty quiet people. Coming from large extended families with extrovert brothers/cousins/aunts/everyone except us, we've just naturally taken a backseat in conversations. I hate yelling, too. Sorry if you think I murmur.

So how in the world did we get a child that loves to coo and squeal and carry on all day, everyday?

Oh, that's why...

Oh yes.. I should have known.

Thanks Grandmommie and all my cousins! Momma taught me the skills, but y'all taught me the thrills!

As of last week, her cooing has exploded. For the longest time I was wanting her to begin interacting with me, especially while nursing. I thought that would be the sweetest thing, to be in the middle of nursing, have her make eye contact, and talk to each other.

Wow. While it's still sweet, it takes even longer for her to nurse now. She'll eat for a while.. but then all of a sudden we have to coo and squeal! Then she decides oh, I'm supposed to be eating [nurse, nurse] just kidding goo goo EEEEH!

And it's most recently carrying over into nap time. We'll do our sleep routine, she looks tired and has all the yawns and relaxed posture. So in the crib she goes... and a few minutes later we hear her start cooing. Yesterday afternoon this went on for at least 30 minutes. This was also the last nap of the day.. so that makes me wonder if she's ready to drop it. I'm not!

Hartley is finally taking an interest in her toys, too. She likes chewing on them, but it's a matter of getting them to her mouth. She's starting to hold on to them, but eventually she finds her hands and drops the toy. OH! Over the weekend, I went to get her up from a nap and found her sucking her thumb. Big first. And it hasn't happened since.

I'm definitely enjoying these new developments. It may sound like I'm complaining sometimes, with her playing instead of nursing, but I'm not. I enjoy every minute of Hartley. And before we know it, she's gonna be talking (for real) and asking tons of questions and sleeping 12 hours at a time. As much as I look forward to those days, I'm going to miss her now.

I'll miss picking at her cradle cap and slathering on lotion 5 times a day. Going through 3-4 outfits a day. Sucking boogers from her nose every morning. Reading little books while she can still fit on my lap (and doesn't squirm to be let down). Oh, and this 2.5 hour schedule.. (not).

ready for a break!

What a busy weekend we had!

We had a good excuse to go to Atlanta- a wedding! And what a beautiful wedding it was. Of course, Marshall and I take tons of pictures of Hartley and friends.. but we never got a picture of us as a family. This makes me really upset. I think total we have 2 family pictures. One from Valentine's and the other from Easter. So if you ever visit the Moore's take a picture of our family. Please.

We stayed at the Copenhaver's B&B, a very charming and creaky house in the most ethnic part of Atlanta. There was a very rousing game of MadGab and yummy Five Guys!

Prior to the wedding, we met with Krysten and Matt for California Pizza Kitchen. Marshall is pretty skeptical about chain pizzerias, but he seemed to enjoy his jerk chicken pizza. And I loved my goat cheese with peppers!

Auntie Krysten absolutely adores Hartley! I only wish we had a longer visit. We had to head back to the Copenhaver's to nurse and get ready for the wedding.

This little girl was so behaved. Well, considering Marshall had to take her out of the church before the bride was given away. She was ready to eat! But did so well at the reception. We walked around with her, fed her some more (oh yeah, with a bottle!!), and she took a siesta in her carseat.

Hartley surprisingly slept the whole 4 hour drive from Brooklet to Atlanta. We thought she would do the same thing on the way home, considering she had a busy day and it was her usual bedtime. And we had just been bragging about her to my momma when...

She wanted to eat. So I climb in the backseat and give her the third bottle of the day. Well, bottle and being strapped into a carseat don't mix. She drank too quickly and we weren't able to pull over soon enough to burp her. So, after 30 minutes of attempting to burp her in a McDonald's parking lot we finally got back on the road. Oh, and we noticed our car started smoking at that point.

We finally made it home around 11:30pm. Hartley ate one more time and we went to bed. Then we started another busy day on Sunday. Happy Mother's Day and Happy Birthday, Marshall.

Marshall was kind enough to let me be the star. He took me to a food court and I got TWO pieces of Sbarro's pizza and half of Marshall's chicken teriyaki. I love food. :)

We celebrated the important day with Marshall's family later that evening. It was a strange meal, consisting of a fried turkey and cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, spicy green beans, fresh pineapple, steak, and Shoney's strawberry pie. I won't complain, it was delish!

Hartley was sooo tired. We came and put her to bed. She managed to wake up around 5:30am. I tried letting her cry it out. There are some nights she'll sleep straight through, other nights she'll want to nurse. I was going to see if she would fall back asleep without nursing. She managed to cry about 10 minutes and fall back asleep.. only to wake up again. So I nursed.

And around 7:40 she woke up again. Tried the cry it out method again. Umm.. yeah. That one worked! I woke up around 9am and she was still asleep. Needless to say we started our day rather late. :)

As for the car, our transmission may be shot. Here's to hoping for a new car!!! (please, Marshall??)

Hartley Caroline

Over at Kelly's Korner, it's Show Us Your Life Friday. Never have I met this woman, but she is inspiring, encouraging, and so cute!

Today's topic.. Kids' Names. Kid's Names? Never really got the apostrophe thing down..

I've had names picked out since high school at least. But they've changed every few years. And the names I've chosen for the next kids will probably change also.. maybe. While Marshall and I were TTC (trying to conceive for you new bloggies out there), I had my list of potentials. At the top were Olivia Peyton, Marshall Emory, and Kensley Beth. And friends weren't so sure about us combining our names. Marshall + Amanda = Marshanda.

Months later, June to be exact, my suspicions were confirmed and we were in fact with child. Well, I threw Olivia out the door because it seemed like everyone was having Olivias. And Kensley? Well, a girl I worked with was having a Kinsley. Too close. And Emory? Well, Marshall was determined we were having a girl.

Sho' nuff. We did. :)

Hartley Caroline

Miss Hartley is what we call her. Among Sweetie, Darlin', Troublemaker, Faker, etc. We found "Hartley" on the internet. Sad, huh? People always ask if it's a family name. Well it is now. We really wanted a unique name, but not terribly different or hard to pronounce/spell.

Apparently, it's a boy's name though. This is the conversation I had with Marshall's grandmother over Christmas.

Grandmother: So, you're naming the baby Hartley?

Me: Yes, ma'am.

Grandmother: I thought you were having a girl.

[ummm.. try to be nice, try to be nice.]

Even if it's a boy's name, I don't care. I like it. And it sounds pretty feminine to me. Sorry, Hartley. If Hartley came out a boy instead of a girl, she would have been Harrison Carter. Maybe.

As for Caroline, I just like the sound of the two together. My maiden name is Carroll.. so it's kind of a feminine form for it.

I would love to use family names for future children. If we ever have twins (it's possible) and they are boy and girl, we'll have Jack and Lucy. Named after my grandparents.

Marshall is named after his great-grandfather and grandfather, Hunter Marshall Robertson. I love the name Hunter, but there is a cousin with that name. Oh, the joys of being the youngest in the family. But we'll use Marshall for sure.

Of course, my names will probably change. I never imagined having my sweet Hartley Caroline until I was pregnant with her. And I couldn't imagine naming her any differently.

yay for cribs!

I'm pleased to announce the swing weaning (sweanging?) went wonderfully. Hartley has been in her crib since we started, I don't know, two weeks ago? We have a routine before naps and bedtime. We change, swaddle, rock/read a book, sing/hum, get a few yawns out, and lay down. There was a good bit of crying the first few days. But guess what! Most days there isn't any crying! We may have a few minutes, maybe 3-5, but she usually falls asleep easily! We have a difficult evening every now and then.

Her face cracks me up.

There have been a few occasions where she awoke early from her nap and it wasn't time to nurse, so I put her in the swing to finish her nap.

During this time I would love to have a video monitor. With her not crying I have no idea when she really falls asleep. In the beginning we could tell when she finally drifted off. Her "sleepy cry" is so funny. Actually it's quite pathetic, but she would stop mid-cry and fall asleep. But now that she rarely cries before falling asleep we have no idea how long it really takes her. One day I might pretend to leave the room but stay and watch her.

Now we are working on the deswaddling. During the day she has her arms free, at night she is completely cocooned. However, whenever I get her to nurse during the night/early morning she has wiggled her arms out anyway. And how is it possible that she scoots around her crib? Recently she made a 180 degree turn in there. She baffles me. I'm not ready for this!

She is sooo ready to start moving and rolling over. But she's just not there yet. We started putting her in the walker a few weeks ago. She does pretty well holding herself up. But sometimes I'll turn around (I usually keep her in the kitchen while I cook, clean) and she's "fallen over" and leaning on top of the tray of the walker. And of course she doesn't like that.

My next task to accomplish, that we've been working on for months.. her 45-minute intruder. I've done so much research attempting to resolve this issue. She sleeps very well at night, with usually 1 feeding, and falls back asleep easily. But during the day her naps are at a minimum of 45 minutes and if I'm lucky she might go an hour.

She acts like she's hungry, but once we start nursing she falls asleep and acts sleepy the entire feeding. So I think that's out of the question.

Diapers have never been a problem, since she usually waits until she wakes up to go. I can't believe this either..

Is her nursery too hot?? Too cold?? I don't think so?

I don't think she can self-soothe herself after the 45-minute sleep transition. At least that's what I have gathered. And crying it out doesn't seem to help. I've learned that I make her even more upset by going in to check on her/rewrap her.

Fortunately, for some babies there comes a day when napping longer just clicks. I'm hoping we're nearing that time. Until then, I will be thankful for a happy baby that sleeps in her crib without any sleep props.

mommies don't have weekends

Mommies don't have any time off. Mommies are on-call 24/7. But babies love mommies most. :)
And Grandmommies love babies. Especially this one.

My Momma came for a quick visit this weekend to see her favorite grandbaby. They hadn't seen each other in a month, but they picked up right where they left off. Gibber-jabbering with one another. You wouldn't know it in the pictures, though.

Momma has been wanting to see Hartley in her dress the Cerqua ladies got her. I tried it on when she first got it and it swallowed her. But now, weeks later and little onesie underneath, it's adorable. The shoes however.. it might be a few months.

Momma decided it would be fun to toss Hartley around in the air. Okay, not toss or swing but she wasn't exactly gentle. Which is why Momma got spit up on. I've been a little rougher with her lately, too. She's got much better control over her neck so I hold her in the air a little. After a good burping.

We have a wedding to go to in Marietta this weekend. It will be a short trip, leave Friday afternoon and return Saturday night. Honestly, I have no idea how Hartley will behave. I think she is starting her growth spurt (considering how last night went, thanks Marshall). And we really need to find the right bottle nipple for her so that I don't have to nurse during a wedding (mainly because the dress I'll wear is SO not conducive to nursing). But it matches Hartley's dress and that's all the matters. :)

On to cleaning the house while it pours outside! Or maybe I'll just take a nap. Yesterday's magic nap number was THREE!